I don't need you; I'm brand new. from moonii on 8tracks.

My first mixtape of the year.

my way of life

Give something your all or nothing at all.
Love completely or not at all.
That's the only way to go for me.


Todo o nada.
All or nothing.

I AM OFFICIALLY IN LOVE WITH ANNA CALVI/HAVE ALWAYS BEEN BUT SERIOUSLY OH MY GODDESS.

No Room For Doubt

Shoutout to Dylan for introducing me to this song. It's got quiet vibes--exactly what I tend to love in music, photographs and art in general.

"No Room for Doubt" by Lianne La Havas ft. Willy Mason

"Te amo para siempre."

“It’s okay?”
“Está bien.”
“What?”
 “That means it’s okay in Spanish.”
“Oh. How do you say, I love you forever?”
“Te amo para siempre.”

I'll remember yesterday night.

D.J.

Had the opportunity to photograph D.J. Wiley recently. Props for creating sick music. Go like his Facebook page--he's dropping a new track tonight.

Disclaimer: I am clean.

 

It was a few days before my birthday when my new dentist told me, "You must never smoke. Or else it will definitely kill you because of your condition." I was disappointed to hear the news, but his tone told me he was not kidding.

I listen to my dentist.

a someday-series

See this series of photographs above? (Disclaimer: not mine, I don't know whose they are)

Well, someday I’d like to do a project like this. Maybe I shouldn’t call it a project—it’s something a lot more intimate and personal than that.

But you see—someday I want to photograph a person. Just one.

And I want to photograph them every season at the same place.

The thing that stunned me is that I’ve been doing this all along, sort of—sometimes I photograph her, sometimes I don’t; but I want to be very serious about this future endeavor of mine (not that I’m not serious about this current arrangement).

And, to make it more different and complex, I want it to be the same date, every month and year. And I guess that would mean that this person is someone I wouldn’t be able to see very often, save for the day(s) we’d meet to honor this arrangement.

But the more and more I think about it, the more improbable it seems.

First off—who…?

And second of all—is it possible for two people to meet at the same place on the same date every year—no matter what?

I hope so.

Class Actress - Bienvenue

"Bienvenue" by Class Actress
Directed by Clement Gino and Gregory Faure
Featuring: Elizabeth Harper (Class Actress) and Sina Araghi

for a rainy day

rain rain rain by mathieuschreyer

JUST DO THIS, 'TILLY.

If you want to submit digitally, here are the instructions:

1. e-mail your janx as an attachment to chantillyandromeda@gmail.com 
2. include the following information per piece:
• name
• grade
• date
• English teacher
• art teacher (if applicable)
• type of work (art, poem, short story, etc.)
• title of piece
• brief description of your piece

P.S. It took me roughly 20-30 minutes to design this, so you can definitely take 5 minutes to fill out a form and turn it in to Andro with something you've already created, no? 

just my type

If your name is Erlend Øye and you are the love of my life a musical genius/the vocalist of Kings of Convenience and The Whitest Boy Alive and wear matching glasses, you fit the description.

Personally, this is a very special song to me, because of E., I guess. 

I'm learning to live again--without you.

Outtakes:

Portfolio of a Creative Mind

Portfolio of a Creative Mind from Matteo di Pascale on Vimeo.

week 2

Monday, Jan. 9

• snow shoot with Ariana

Tuesday, Jan. 10

• eh.

Wednesday, Jan. 11

• Exclaimed very loudly in AP Spanish, "SOY LA BOMBA" in front of the class. 
• Cried from laughing for the first time ever (you’d think that i would’ve experienced that before…) in AP Spanish.
• completed Calc homework and actually felt that I understood what was going on in class for once in my life/the first time in a few months seriously
• slept through 90% of Government but raised my hand like a boss (while being half-asleep) when Miles said, “Raise your hand if you’re listening to me.”
• played Taboo for the first time in my life. while eating fried chicken.
• got shit done. knocked off 5 out of 7 things on my to do list just for today (e.g. applied for FAFSA PIN)

Thursday, Jan. 12

• watched Pan's Labyrinth for the first time in my life. I didn't get to finish it, though...
• had the most ridiculous portraits taken of me using someone’s Mac’s Photo Booth during Human Anatomy
• Got accepted to VCUarts

Friday, Jan. 13

• Attended swim & dive meet at Oak Marr; it's the first time I've been back in years and it's the first time I've mentored someone in photography on a one-on-one basis.
• Wrote three scholarship essays within 1.5 hours and submitted them.

Saturday, Jan. 14

• FAFSA

Sunday, Jan. 15

• Anjali - we painted and planted the tree, we grabbed Starbucks in the morning, we talked, it was wonderful
• my throat hurts

P.S. the two Polaroids/Instaxes were taken during newspaper on Jan. 11.

I've decided that I'm not completely over Blogger yet and people actually still use Blogger, so I'm going to start recapping my life in brief for each week on here just to utilize this blog more often. Basically I'm just extracting snippets from my diary entries on Tumblr.

just my type

Starting a "just my type" tag for future posts. Interpret the label as you wish.

"You're in a dream."

12:52 a.m.

I was in bed for about twenty minutes and I dreamt of you and the school. The school’s walls were painted my favorite shade of blue and plastered with giant cutouts from vintage fashion magazines. As we approached the main stairway, I explained to you the significance of the color blue to me while gesturing at the cutouts on the walls. You walked farther from me, and suddenly we were sitting in this cafe that exists in the school in my dream, you were sitting a table away from me, I got up and I felt that you were literally in arm’s reach, I think that was the closest I ever got to being lucid in a dream because I kept repeating to myself, You’re in a dream, you’re in a dream, but I shoved the seat and table away from me that were separating you from me and I took one big step and I was going to grab you and hug you and all the while you’re in a dream kept resounding throughout my dream, I don’t know where the actual sound came from, but the moment my hands reached you, I felt some invisible force very abruptly and literally yank me away and I woke up immediately.

Now I am cold and out of bed and tired again (and that pile of Calculus won't solve itself, damn slope fields).

Reality became my dream, my dream became reality, what difference does it make when in the end it seems that it doesn’t matter where we are, dreams or reality, we are never together?

 My dreams tell truths.

just my type

future soulmate, take note.

she's a maniac

Maniac reworked to something more beatastic in the modern sense.


And the original Maniac (from Flashdance), which is still pure gold to me.

snowy scenery in transit

JANUARY 9, 2012

on the bus back home

past a field i've always wanted to shoot in

The Valley covered in snow

The Valley Path

Silhouetted trees as they can only be in the winter

Home

1

outtakes

week 1 - we'll hate what we've lost but we'll love what we find

I am finding ways to start this year off properly.

the only reality

January 7, 2012


The Only Reality

Inspiration tends to strike me after midnight.
This is still a work in progress, but I have a great idea and vision in mind. It might take a while to complete, though.

I would give up loving someone if I could since I don't think it's right to try to persuade someone to love you back (this was one of the things that bothered me about 500 Days of Summer--unrequited love absolutely sucks, but it's douche-y and terrible to try to force a girl to love you when she just doesn't have feelings for you). EDIT: If it's meant to be, forcing your feelings onto people is not necessary. They will love you regardless of whether you ask them to or not. I don't think true love can be forced.

But it's not all that simple. You can't just willfully stop loving someone or stop having feelings for someone all of the sudden. Or at least I can't. I don't think it's possible for me to stop loving someone (or something) once I've started. And it's not at all possible for me to control who I fall in love with and when that happens. I've got no defense against love, none at all.

(Aside: it astounds me now to think that practically all of me and all that I stand for is dedicated to love, based on love, and in search of love, whether it be in a profession or a person or both or many.)

I considered a question and a thought. I don't know if I'd want to stop having feelings all of the sudden or if I'd want to stop loving someone all of a sudden.

The thought that came to me today was: isn't wishing you weren't a love with someone (who doesn't return your feelings) a bit selfish just because of the accompanying pains and aches?

Does that make any sense? Does anyone know what I am saying?

I don't know.

Yesterday,

I lost; the realization and acceptance today made me sigh and smile a little, not out of happiness, but not out of bitterness, either, I'm not sure why I smiled but I did.

I've been very tired of hoping and expecting anything at all.

I clung to every word you ever said.

I starved and thirsted as though I had been wandering the desert for months (months! good grief, can you believe it? because I never thought I'd be this way) searching for your words, the sole oasis in a forsaken and unforgiving land, but all I ever found was nothing but a mirage of you and sand, lots of sand, sand everywhere, grains of sand, a swarm of sand, sand dunes, sandstorms.

Love is the only adversary I have lost to, and love will always be the only adversary I will ever lose to.

But I'll never lose love, or at least I most strongly believe I will not.

reality and impressions

This photograph reminds me of the painting Der Wanderer über dem Nebelmeer (Wanderer above the Sea of Fog) by Caspar David Friedrich, yes? The similarities are astoundingly uncanny.

Learn to Let Go

Tashaki Miyaki - Somethin' Is Better Than Nothin'

Tashaki Miyaki - Somethin' Is Better Than Nothin' from The Sounds Of Sweet Nothing on Vimeo.


I love everything about this--the [melancholia] mood, the dream vibes, the jellyfish, the ocean vibes, the black-and-white, the underwater/swimming scenes. I love it.